Today, I am going to take you through the whole journey of arranged matrimony. It all starts with spouse hunting. Our demands are as high as the burj khalifa, we want a spouse who looks nothing less than perfect, no matter how funny we look.
After The potential spouse is fixed after years of tireless searching, itstime to negotiate the most terrifying part of the marriage contract, the dowry. dowry is making marriages really difficult for Young men and young women, because of which they are becoming older men and older women. Recently, it was in saudi news that a girl had demanded iPhone 6 for her marriage. Reportedly, Boys are terrified after that.
Anyway, after Dowry is agreed upon! Most of the times, reluctantly, the Wedding date is fixed. The families of bride and groom spend weeks and months, and all their life savings planning every little detail of the party from flowers to decorations to the lavish dinner. I am 200% sure even our governments don’t do so much of planning and hardwork.
Weeklong pre wedding festivities and endless shopping visits completely exhaust the bride and groom and leave them sleep deprived. And then on the wedding day, when they are supposed to be looking their best, they end up looking like overdressed Zombies.
Its the day when finally the girl will realize how it feels like to be a display piece. She has been dieting all these days but unfortunately she actually is 2pounds heavier because of all the make up. She has spent so much on her wedding dress that she will wear only once in her life. Ofcourse, She will want to wear it again in future but we all know that its never gonna fit again.
The weddings do not start until after 2 hours mentioned in the designer invitation card, and the party will end the next morning2 am, 3am…. Sunrise is the limit.
Thousands and thousands of guests are invited. Everybody who is fairly, even remotely related to us. People who we have never met in decades and who we will never see after that night. Everyone’s invited.
They all learn a lot of lessons from the party.They decide then and there what their own wedding would be like. If this wedding had the most gorgeous decoration. They promise themselves that they are gonna outdo this and start scheming it in their minds right away. If this wedding had 29 dishes they already start preparing a menu of 36 delicacies. After all its a competition, Competition to show off ur status and wealth. And wedding happens only once in a lifetime.
So we spend half of our adulthood saving money for this day, and the other half repaying the marriage loan.
Every time there is a wedding in the family or neighborhood. New trends are set. Even if we can afford grand weddings, let us try not to indulge as we are indirectly setting impossible standards for the society .There was an infographic by Randal Olson which showed that the more the money spent on the wedding, the more chance it had of ending in a divorce, but we still insiston extravagance. We still insist on cooking elaborate dishes only to throw half the food away. We should have parties without dinner and see how many people actually turn up.
Why make marriage so difficult and time consuming when all it requires is signing a contract, or exchanging vows or performing a set of few rituals which do not require more than 30 minutes. Why are we making weddings so impossible for our youth and causing delayed marriages ? We need to stop thinking of our dream weddings and start planning our dream marriages. Because, wedding is just for a day but marriage is forever, it definitely feels so. Let’s make weddings easy because married life is going to be hard anyway.
Let us make marriage easy.
Is marriage becoming too difficult in your culture? Let me know in the comments..